When You Know, You Just Know. Follow the Clues.

I found myself drawn to my happy journal today. There was a time in my life when I was writing a lot of heavy, dreadful feelings. Life felt really hard. I was despondent, struggling, confused, and unsure. It was a time with a lot of inner turmoil and my dad recommended that I write “things that I am happy about” in a journal dedicated to just that, things that I was happy about or things that made me feel happy. He gifted me a new Bee Happy journal to do just that.

That was 25 years ago.

I cannot recall the last time I opened it. Today was the day I was drawn to it and I am delighted to have found this entry from 9.26.2003 (when I was in graduate school at Teachers College studying Sociology and Education with a concentration in Public Policy):

Someday I am going to look back and remember these days of reading and dreaming about my excitement to do, empower, change, teach, be a professor, share, write and continue to learn. The feeling I have is an elated one, a high that I get only when I am excited, a true glow from within, a giddy -I know feeling. The notion that I know I am doing the right things. I just know! Everything just comes together- books, words, articles, people, thoughts all about what I am thinking- like a path- follow the clues.

Today, now, just shy of 22 years since this writing, I am smiling. I am still following the clues and giddy with excitement and delight.  This knowing has gotten stronger and is fueled by conviction. For I am the path, the path is me.

Following the clues and listening to the inner cues.

Smiling wide and giddy with excitement and delight,

Sara